beginnings

It's Time To Remove The Band-Aid: An Artist's Guide to Endings

I have a really hard time quitting things, which makes it even harder to start. Just thinking about the pain of an ending is enough to deter me from beginning in the first place. Unfortunately, it turns out that most things, good and bad, come to an end. You just can’t avoid it.

If I’ve learned anything from the past several years in music, it's that sometimes you have to give up to let go. Whether it's finishing a song or splitting up a band or walking away from a deal, when you know a chapter is closing, you just know. Don't hold on, drag it out, or try to keep the door pried open. Make a move while you still have a good mind about things. Before it gets painful to the point it blinds you. Trust your intuition when it’s time to remove the band-aid. 

I only recently discovered the gravity of the band-aid analogy this month when I made a few difficult endings. Here’s the thing about bandaids:

Patrick Fore

Patrick Fore

  1. Band-aids are temporary. Notice and accept the fact that people, jobs, and other experiences come into our lives to serve a specific purpose. When that purpose has been fulfilled its time to move on. Let those things go, so you can receive your next gift and they can be of service to someone else. 
  2. Most importantly, the universal purpose of a band-aid is to heal. We've all got issues we are consciously and/or subconsciously working to resolve. There are patterns that continue to show up in our lives and teach us. Taking the time to step back and be aware of how current situations are helping us reconcile the past makes it clearer to see when it’s time to move forward. It doesn’t make it easy, but it helps. I had to recognize that fear was the reason I kept a job that no longer suited me. I had to acknowledge that I was burned by a few business interactions and that my next partnership was about learning to trust again more than anything else. That didn't mean it was meant to last forever. I let it go. My goals had shifted, and I needed to make a change to be intentional about my future. 

It's one of the most difficult things I've ever had to do. But the more comfortable I get with the uncomfortable task of closing doors, the easier it becomes for me to open new ones.