I Am Not An Expert

As I begin calling in more consistency when it comes to sharing with the world not only my work, but my words, I feel compelled to put this out there:

I am not an expert.

I don’t really know how to be more productive or quiet negative thoughts.

I don’t really know how to beat your fears or thrive on this stomach-churning rollercoaster that is life.

I don’t really know how any of this is going to work for you in terms of personal success and peace of mind.

All I have is my experience - as I’m living it and creating it in real time. That’s all I got. That’s my gift with return receipt.

I am not an expert. I am an experiment.

ex·per·i·ment (noun)

a scientific procedure undertaken to make a discovery, test a hypothesis, or demonstrate a known fact.

"I have tested this by experiment"

synonyms:test, investigation, trial, inquiry, demonstration; 

I am a series of hard tries and hard fails and second chance after second chance and hard resets of all the clocks.

It’s Groundhog Day meets The Matrix meets The Secret meets The Truman Show with a lot of improv in between.


I’m learning how to hack this for myself - by reading, writing, thinking, and not-thinking.

I’m also learning how to cope with just “feeling.” And letting that lead me into just “being.”

Sure, I’ve got glimpses of change, blips on the radar, islands on the horizon that I’m semi-mapping out in public. Still, anything beyond that is a complete mystery.

True wisdom is knowing what you don’t know
— Confucious, apparently.

But hey, not knowing can be a beautiful thing.

And that’s no expert opinion. Just my experience.